April Fools Day: Ronin Style
by Pendragon
Summary: 'Nuff said.
1. April Fool's Day: Ronin Style

**Disclaimer: **None of these characters are mine; they belong to their rightful owners. (Their names escape me at the moment).

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An unseen assailant stalks the Ronins at every turn; foreseeing every move they make and every step they take.It's one of those days that comes only once a year and what does this stranger have in store?

# April Fool's Day: Ronin Style

7:34 am-April 1st

A scream rings through the air.

"White Blaze!What on earth has happened to you?" Ryo cried in shock.He had woken up this morning to find not the white tiger he had grown up with, but one that was. . . pink.During the night someone had snuck into his room and dyed his beautiful tiger pink.

White Blaze, surprised by his owner's reaction, looked himself over.He glanced back at Ryo with an expression of confusion and anger on his pink face.The tiger emitted a low, puzzled growl.

"I don't know who did it boy, but why don't we find out." Ryo said jumping out of bed and leaving his room to go gather his other companions.

7:46 am-April 1st

Everyone was awake and sitting around the kitchen table; everyone except Rowen who was still in bed, with him it was like trying to wake the dead.

"So none of you did this?" Ryo said as he motioned towards one embarrassed tiger who, presently, was cowering beneath the table.Everyone shook their heads. "And no one saw anybody else do it either?" Another simultaneous shake of heads.Ryo sighed heavily.

Kento's laughing was the first thing to break the heavy silence that had descended upon the room.Sage, Cye, and Ryo all looked up at the rude noise to see Rowen standing in the doorway.Everyone burst out laughing though Cye and Sage were doing their best to hide it but failing miserably.Rowen looked at them all in surprise, what was so funny?

"Look at your face," Sage choked out between laughs.

Rowen raced upstairs, looked in a bathroom mirror and yelled.His face looked like a cross between a clown's and a cat's.Someone had taken a dozen different colored markers and scribbled all over his face, he also had lipstick on.Quickly soaking a washrag he vainly tried to wash off his face.The lipstick came off fairly easy, but the marker, Rowen dejectedly found out, was permanent.

Depressed, he wandered back downstairs.Kento was hiccupping from laughing too much and the others still snickered now and then but otherwise everyone had pretty much calmed down.

9:56 am-April 1st

Ryo had gone out to try and give White Blaze a bath, Rowen was hiding his face behind a large book, Cye was kicking Kento's butt at cards and Sage had decided to grab a quick shower.

Some peculiar sounds followed the end of Sage's shower.Mostly those of him cursing loudly and stomping angrily down the stairs to confront Cye, Kento, and Rowen in the living room.

"Uh oh," Muttered Kento after one glance at Sage's red face.

Cye looked up from the cards. "What is it now?" He asked ignoring the earlier comment.

Sage hesitated before saying, "Whose been putting Rogaine in my deodorant?" Everyone broke out laughing and Kento started hiccupping again.

"Is it blonde?" He asked loudly making everyone laugh even harder.Sage walked up to Kento looking ready to punch his lights out.Sobering up quickly, Cye stepped between them.Kento decided to retreat to the kitchen at that point.

Sage, quarry lost, stomped back upstairs to take care of his problem.

12:02 pm-April 1st

Kento looked up just as the back door opened and a very frustrated-looking Ryo walked in.He was completely drenched with water, soapsuds dotted his shirt here and there, and his entire left side was covered in mud.Following his was a very smug-looking, but bone dry, pink tiger.

"What happened to you?" Kento asked, taking another bite of an over-stuffed sandwich.

"I learned the hard way that White Blaze doesn't like baths.When he wouldn't get wet voluntarily I tried to force him but he just dragged me through the mud." Ryo paused. "I'm going to get a shower." He said tiredly and made his way upstairs.

About ten minutes later, the quiet climate of the house was violently disrupted as a string of cursing came from the bathroom.Everyone rushed to the door as a very pissed off Ryo emerged in a bathrobe.

"Someone's put dead bugs in my shampoo!" He yelled, more frustrated than shocked.

Cye grimaced as he pulled a dead beetle from Ryo's jet-black hair and tossed it into a nearby wastebasket.

"We've really got to figure out whose doing this." Ryo remarked quietly.

12:12 pm-April 1st

Everyone dispersed when Ryo went to go comb the bugs out of his hair.Kento had gone back to his room to relax and listen to the radio.Unfortunately, when he turned on his stereo the tape player kicked in instead.What he heard, though, wasn't even close to the tape he had in there.In fact, it sounded just like a giant purple dinosaur he used to watch when he was three.It was going full blast and Kento couldn't do a thing about it because the stereo buttons wouldn't work.

Rowen burst through the door with only one question on his mind, "Why the heck are you playing Barney?"

The other Ronins hurried into the room trying to figure out what the racket was all about.

"I love you. . ." came from the stereo.

"Shut. . ." commanded Ryo, voice hoarse from being abused all day long.

"You love me. . ."

" . . .It . . ."

"We're a happy family. . . "

" . . .OFF!"

"I can't!" Kento yelled back.

"Unplug it." Supplied Sage.Kento tore the plug from the wall but the music didn't quit.

"Take the batteries out!" Cye suggested.Kento picked up the stereo and began to fumble with the door that held them in.The little door fell to the floor and he scrambled to pull the batteries out.

"They're jammed!" He yelled.

No one had noticed when he left, but Rowen pushed his way back into the room and walked over to Kento.Only then did anyone see the screwdriver he held.He raised it high above his head then plunged it deep into the back of the doomed stereo.Kento let out an angry cry as the player gave one last hum, sputtered, and finally died.The room lapsed into silence as Rowen walked out.

"Hey, what'd you do that for?" Kento yelled after Rowen.But it was too late; he had already gone back to his room and was buried deep in another book.

6:05 pm-April 1st

After helping Kento clean up his dismantled stereo and promising him that they would pick up a new one tomorrow, Cye had finally gotten around to cooking dinner.Everyone had already assembled at the dining room table by the time he had gotten all the food set out.Kento, as usual, had started eating before he even sat down.

Cye took a seat slowly, thinking he had forgotten something.He deliberately picked at his food for a moment, deep in thought.Suddenly, it came to him and he tried to get up.But he couldn't for some odd reason.He tried to rise again but only got the same result.

"Cye, what's wrong?" Ryo asked from the other end of the table.He had noticed what Cye had been doing, although, it looked more like a nervous fidgeting to him.

"Well, uh," Cye started, "I seem to be stuck to my chair."

All the talking in the room stopped the minute he said that.Everybody walked over to his end of the table to investigate.

"Why on Earth are you glued to your chair?" Sage asked.

"I didn't do it!" Cye cried.

"We need to get you out of this." Said Ryo. "Unzip your pants."

"What!?" Cye yelled in confusion.

"That's the only way to get you out of this mess."

Reluctantly, Cye obeyed.He struggled out of his pants nearly tipping the chair over.When he was free he was left standing in his t-shirt and a pair of boxers.

"Fish?" Kento asked, on the verge of laughing.Cye's boxers were covered in rainbow fish; they looked like something out of a Dr. Seuss book.

"Hey!" He complained trying to hide them by pulling his shirt down.Cye then retreated upstairs to put on a new pair of pants.

Everybody went and sat back down to eat.Sage had a way too pleased smile on his face all of the sudden.

"What's with you?" Kento asked.Normally Sage was never this happy.

"I've figured out whose been doing all this." He said calmly.

"You what?" Called Ryo, Rowen, Kento, and Cye-who had returned-in unison.

"I've figured out who our joker is and it is-"

After this part the story gets pretty ugly, so I've decided to stop it here.

The End?


	2. April Fool's Day: Ronin Revenge

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it, alright?

This one isn't as good as the first one only because I used up all my good ideas on the first.Please don't flame me.

April Fool's Day: Ronin Revenge

"-Kayura and the warlords." Sage concluded after a monumental pause.

"What a dirty trick!" Growled Kento.

"You mean tricks," Rowen corrected. "You weren't the only one to be fooled." He had been thinking back on what had happened and decided, with much deliberation, that his face had looked most like a wrinkled pug's.

"So what do we do now?"

"We trick them back." Said Sage.

"Yeah, April Fool's Day isn't quite over yet; we still have five some hours left." Cye reasoned. "Is that enough time though?"

"Of course it is, but we'll have to work fast." Ryo pointed out. "Let's go!"

Everyone dispersed from the table, each with their own plan in mind.

6:31 pm-April 1st

Meanwhile . . ..

"Nice trick Cale," Dais congratulated. "The Rogaine's going into the hall of fame.I should have thought of something like that."

"Are you kidding?I had to start putting it into his deodorant a week ago."

"I have to admit," Laughed Kayura. "I've never heard so much cursing in my life!"

The four of them were sitting in the living room of the house they had purchased after Talpa's defeat, laughing.But the humor eventually wore away and all of them stopped laughing . . . well, at least most of them.

Sekhmet was rolling on the floor still laughing so hard he was crying.The two other warlords and Kayura rolled their eyes and walked out of the room leaving Sekhmet to himself.

7:00 pm-April 1st

The Ronins had easily infiltrated the warlord's home and were preparing to launch their first attack.

After eating dinner the three warlords sat down with dessert that happened to be tapioca pudding.

"You know, tapioca pudding loses its taste after the seventh night in a row." Dais said.

"I agree," replied Sekhmet. "What about you Cale?"

"I think it's pretty good tonight."

"Are you crazy?"

"No, just put some raisins in it and see."

There was a pause.

"Uh, Cale," Dais said quietly. "We don't have any raisins."

Sekhmet rose and walked over behind Cale's chair. "Oh boy," sighed Sekhmet, looking over Cale's shoulder. "Those aren't raisins, those are dead flies."

Cale blanched and his eyes went wide; he dropped the bowl, clapped a hand over his mouth, and ran upstairs to the bathroom.Unfortunately, at the very same time, Kayura had been taking a shower.There was a blood-curdling scream that pounded warlord's ears six feet into their skull and Kayura came pelting from the bathroom wrapped up in a soaking wet towel.Still screaming she ran for her room.

7:13 pm-April 1st

Kayura sat in her bedroom taking a brush through her still-wet hair.She was so angry about what had happened earlier that she hadn't noticed what was happening to her hair as she combed.Kayura's hair was lightening till it was almost a pure white.She stared dumbly at the mirror until she finally stumbled upon the conclusion that someone had put peroxide in her spray-in conditioner.Another scream rang through the house startling Cale, Dais, and Sekhmet who, at that very moment, was on top of a ladder laying the final card on top of an incredibly large card tower.He started and all fifty-two cards tumbled to the floor.

Kayura ran down the stairs. "Okay, who is responsible for this?"

"For what?" The warlords asked.

"Someone put something in my conditioner that caused this!" She turned her head showing them the large blotch of dyed-white hair she had been screaming about.

"Wow," commented Sekhmet. "Why'd you do that?"

"I didn't!" Kayura screamed and almost succeeded in knocking his head off before Cale decided to hold her back so she could calm down.

"So who's behind this?" She asked.

The warlords shrugged.  
  


9:51 pm-April 1st

Little had happened in the past two hours thirty-six minutes and forty-eight point three seconds worth thinking about but Dais had no doubt in his mind that this was just the Ronins getting revenge.He figured that if he went to bed now the Ronins would forget about him and he'd wake up tomorrow to find he was the only one who had escaped.Boy, was he wrong.Nevertheless, he turned out the lights and went to sleep.

Half an hour later, something brushed up against his nose and he awoke with a sneeze.Dais sniffed and looked around.

"Ah, Jesus!!" He cried when he spotted the snake staring at his from two feet away.Panicking, he rolled out of bed.He fell and kept falling.Unfortunately, the snake was only half of the trick; the other half consisted of his bed being raised so that he was sleeping a full twelve feet off the floor.Dais landed with a painful thump on the floor and, to his horror, the snake followed him down.He backed into a corner, screaming.

"What is all the racket?" Kayura asked after bursting into his room.She rolled her eyes again, walked over, and picked up the reptile. "For Pete's sake, a harmless garden snake is nothing to be afraid of.It's probably more scared of you than you are of it."

There was a faint 'I don't think so' from the hallway behind her. 

Kayura walked out and Dais could faintly hear Cale and Sekhmet laughing somewhere out in the hall. 

11:02 pm-April 1st

Sekhmet was the last warlord to be tricked and he was aware of it, which is why it took him so long to get to sleep that night.Sekhmet didn't like surprises like this.

He drifted off to sleep and had a nightmare where, instead of a monster, the senator was in his closet, stalking him.It was approximately 11:47 when he awoke to the call of "fire!".He hopped out of bed and ran for the door.He was half way there when his feet were pulled out from under him.He made another attempt to reach the door but didn't even move another inch closer.Sekhmet looked around for the source of this problem and made a startling discovery.Why on earth were his big toes tied to the bed frame?

But what about the fire?If he stuck around too long he'd be caught in the blaze.He didn't smell a thing though.It hit Sekhmet then and he realized it was the Ronins again.He got up and stomped angrily towards the door but ended up flat on his face again.Growling, he broke the string chaining him to the bed and then left his room.

In the hall he came face-to-face with Kayura, Dais, and Cale.

"We've got to get those Ronins back!Any ideas?"

Silence, but around the corner they could hear maniacal laughter.Following the sound they found the five Ronins laughing their heads off.

"Hey!" Cale yelled. The five teens stopped laughing and looked up.

"Hi." Ryo greeted, still with a goofy smile on his face. "Nice day, huh?"

"We want revenge!" Dais stated.

"What are you going to do?" Asked Kento with mock fear.

"We have the greatest trick you brats will ever see.You haven't forgotten it, have you Cale?" Kayura wondered.

"He couldn't forget it, he's got a mind like a steel trap." Informed Sekhmet.

"That could be dangerous," Cye pointed out. "He has an idea and it would snap his neck and swallow his face."

The Ronins laughed.

"You runts will never top this one!" Cale yelled.

Before anyone could say another word an old grandfather clock downstairs chimed twelve times, signaling it was midnight and the end of April Fool's Day.What ever the warlords had in mind would have to wait till next year.

The Ronins yawned, smiled, and headed home leaving behind four very angry adults.It was time to get some sleep.

The End


End file.
